Powerful Men are not Aggressive

Aggression as Mimicry

The world is increasingly viewing uncompromising, almost confidently dismissive men as successful. And it’s easy to understand why – we are trained to perceive this as a sign that an individual has come to strong conclusions as a result of life’s experiences; the more confident, the more worldly.

What we have not quite caught onto is that there is a huge influx of groups that brainstorm mechanisms of emulating this characteristic in order to appear more masculine.

And in the greatest of ironies, the central mechanism of fueling this mimicry is patently un-masculine: self-victimization. Men are encouraged to feel angry at women, angry at society, angry at men who side with women – angry that all these forces are to blame for their inherent, wretched lack of masculinity. They then funnel this self-hatred into precise antisocial movements that, like sociopaths, they actuate into their everyday lives arbitrarily. Soon enough, they forget what’s real and what isn’t as their mimicry begins to bear fruit, and even begin to identify with this fragile, shallow persona when they look in the mirror.

But really, what does it actually boil down to? Choosing to fear fear and constantly run from it rather than face the fear and overcome it. Terrified that someone or something will make them feel like weak men at any moment, and to constantly offset this by manifesting aggressive surety as a coping mechanism.

The Truly Powerful

The truly powerful, conversely, do not run away from fears. They face them head on. They take responsibility for it. The powerful man understands it is not women, but the types of women he is pursuing that is the cause of his loneliness, or perhaps poor habits he himself has. The powerful man understands it is not society, but his own failure to adapt or change it that results in his alienation. The powerful man takes responsibility for his outcomes; he does not blame the world and lash out.

And though both individuals may appear similar at first glance – confident, worldly, and sure of their positions, there is a distinct difference between the two.

The truly powerful are calm in the face of criticism, as they are safe if they are right and safe if they are wrong; their identity is determined not by the positions they take, but their ability to adapt, which includes both outcomes. The pretender, however, is petrified of being wrong; their identity is not determined by their views or their ability to adapt - it is predicated entirely on not being questioned, and they defend this ferociously.